Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
don62944 don62944 is offline
don62944's Avatar

don62944 is at home.

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 10

See profile

My X decided 3 weeks ago to no longer have any contact with our youngest. She has had only about an hour a week in the past, dinner then drop off.on Fridays. My daughter accepted this so she still had a "mommy". I am working with therapists to work with my daughter on the goodby, after I got a court order to force my x to follow through on the goodby. It is a sad state of affair for a child to go through this after everything else she has gone through. The mother continues to live in the same small town and I am trying to decide if I uproot my kids, 14 year old starting high school this year as I don't know any other way to avoid contact now that her mother will no longer accknowledge her as her daughter. The really sad thing is Serena, my daughter has become a child doing great in school and just returned from a week at the Boys & Girls club with no problems. Finances are not a problem with a move just not sure what to do. Originally from California but no family and not sure of the help with the problems Calif is having, open to advise.
- July 26th, 2009, 08:19 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
dmc80809 dmc80809 is offline
dmc80809's Avatar

dmc80809 one day at a time...

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 224

See profile

Hi, Don, I am very sorry to hear that your kids mom is withdrawing from their lives...is it due to the disability?

There are no easy answers here...I have found that seeking a couple of sessions with a good family therapist can help...

Sending my best to you and the kids...

Dana
- July 27th, 2009, 03:53 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
don62944 don62944 is offline
don62944's Avatar

don62944 is at home.

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 10

See profile

Thanks for the note. She wanted to do things and not be tied down with the responsibility but Serena does not understand that. Serena has a therapist and we have a family therapist but I still can't understand walking away from your child no mater what the reason.
- July 27th, 2009, 04:30 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
Diann1950 Diann1950 is offline
Diann1950's Avatar

Diann1950 Back to work for the week

Pacesetter

Join Date: May 2009

Posts: 266

See profile

That is tough, I work with special ed kids and they get this kind of treatment all to often. It is never easy, but kids do find ways to explain the circumstances in ways that make some sense to them. If you are going to make a move it should be before the transition to high school. I know these days kids are moved a great deal more than in the past but it does help if you get to go through adolescence with the same friends and community. Do you have any relatives who could provide extended family? A grandma or grandparent figure could really be a help to a young girl. I had a wonderful great aunt who was always there to give me encouragement. Luckily my daughter got to experience her too. Continuity is a great luxury these days
Best wishes to all.
- August 3rd, 2009, 07:42 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
cinnamongal cinnamongal is offline
cinnamongal's Avatar

cinnamongal Gettin' serious 'bout havin fun

Newbie

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 32

See profile

That is sad. I can't understand a mother(or father for that matter) not wanting to be with their child. I think it is becoming more prevalent these days. Just be sure to give lots of positive reinforcement to her. Constantly reassure her of her worth and what she has to offer. Sounds like she's doing very well so you're doing something right. Wishing you the very best.
- August 7th, 2009, 08:01 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

srb1968 srb1968 is offline
srb1968's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 23

See profile

I really can't understand why a mother would ever to this. Are all your children adopted? All your kids must have their own special needs. I guess maybe some people are just not cut out to handle it
- August 12th, 2009, 05:49 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
TamiH TamiH is offline
TamiH's Avatar

TamiH is at home.

Newbie

Join Date: Sep 2009

Posts: 6

See profile

Serena is really lucky to have you Don. Two good parents is great, but one great parent can be just as good or even better!
- October 12th, 2009, 05:07 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

« New here and have question? | Array | - »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Is how a man treats his mother important? Sabrina31 Dating 45 July 28th, 2009 09:30 pm
why do guys talk about Golf and their kids only atmyend Using eHarmony 2 June 12th, 2009 03:26 pm
How do I date a girl with kids? justwanttobehappy Ask a Dating Expert 12 June 1st, 2009 06:55 am

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Be consistent, if you like the guy, show some interest, answer his calls, emails, text, whatever. If you miss, return as soon as you get the message. Unless you have really good reason, you shouldn't ... ” – glyster

Join the “For the men:” discussion

“Well, remember that we only know the situation as you tell it. Your initial story said "He too, shared personal information. Drug use, broken relationships." That's it. You don't say whether he ... ” – Jacquesne

Join the “Argh, screwed up with new guy.” discussion

“ I'm so very sorry. It feels like a betrayal of all of you, doesn't it? And maybe you feel that, since you have known your BIL so well, you should have foreseen something so you could have protected ... ” – neardc

Join the “What can I do?” discussion

“If he's about 40 years old + (a mature man) then about one. The next few dates just confirm his first thoughts. In the study of body language, it's said that we make up our minds about new people ... ” – roguewolf1

Join the “how many dates before a guy...” discussion

“How do you know you won't regret? You don't. It's very human to think "but what if". Having said that, I also believe that you won't be in doubt the day you find the person you want to spend the rest ... ” – Mokkesofie

Join the “How do you know you won't regret” discussion

“Man, get a hold of yourself! Oh uhm maybe you should release that tight vise grip on yourself? AZLBRAX_ wrote : My Beloved Mate won't have sex with me anymore. I'm now forced to pay for it ... ” – roguewolf1

Join the “Men: What Women Really Think About Your Body” discussion

“I love your avatars name. Can our Avatars date? Ok my answers: I'm looking for a money hungry, inconsiderate, shallow (must be shallow!) materialistic, unathletic, lazy, shiftless, gossipping, ... ” – roguewolf1

Join the “'Green Flags': What Do You Want in a Partner?” discussion

“Get with the program man! As soon as a man is born, he's automatically guilty. I thought you knew that. I say this because all too often on the internet per dating, it's all one sided. There are ... ” – roguewolf1

Join the “Frustrated & Confused: Is He A Sexual Addict???” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:50 am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0