Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Ask a Dating Expert See what our experts have to say, and then weigh in with your own advice. This discussion board is a great place to discover the wisdom of the group.

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
BadAtNickNames BadAtNickNames is offline
BadAtNickNames's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2008

Posts: 43

See profile

I always wonder what it means when people say a guy has a lot to offer a woman. I don't have a very exciting life (I don't know how to ski, snowboard, or even skateboard), I don't make or have a lot of money, I'm average-looking at best, and I have zero dating experience. Is it therefore accurate to say I don't have anything to offer a woman?
- July 4th, 2009, 09:47 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
D_Lion D_Lion is offline
D_Lion's Avatar

D_Lion - Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Join Date: Aug 2008

Posts: 10,914

See profile

Are you funny? Maybe you can tickle her funny bone … or simply tickle her … or nibble on her neck a little bit, and see what happens?

Anyway, guys who would write “I have a lot to offer … bla bla bla,” probably do not. For sure, the pecking order matters to no end, but having the right character and values will be good enough for enough women to make you successful.
- July 4th, 2009, 10:52 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
j0hn8andy j0hn8andy is online now
j0hn8andy's Avatar

j0hn8andy .....Take off the Rings.....That's the Goal.....

Enthusiast

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 925

See profile

I sure wouldn't tell them I was unexciting, with no money, & nothing to offer! Who would be interested in that, male or female?

What is it about you that makes you unique, that stands out from the crowd? Don't tell me nothing. That's simply not true.

Each of us is a completely different person from all the rest. That's the good part! I am certain you have many good qualities. You just haven't enumerated them here. Figure out what it is you DO have to offer, your very best, then show that front & center!

- July 4th, 2009, 01:36 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
hazmat hazmat is offline
hazmat's Avatar

hazmat is relaxing alone with a cold :(

Veteran

Join Date: Apr 2008

Posts: 1,881

See profile

It all depends on what the person is looking for. Some want a Porsche, while others are happy as a clam with a mini-van.

You can go find a below average looking girl, who can't ski, sits on the couch, and has no money...or...you can learn how to ski, make a few more bucks, start doing a few more exciting things, and expand your possibilities.

Work on that confidence a little bit. Good luck.
- July 4th, 2009, 01:52 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
StPaulGuy StPaulGuy is offline
StPaulGuy's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 10

See profile

Get outside, read a book, read the paper and develop some interests to talk about. You would be surprised how few guys actually read or follow current events.
- July 4th, 2009, 08:30 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

BadAtNickNames BadAtNickNames is offline
BadAtNickNames's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Oct 2008

Posts: 43

See profile

I used to read a lot of books - probably two or three a month. I still read the newspapers everyday. It just seems most women are more interested in a guy who has exciting hobbies than a guy who has a high IQ. And I can hardly blame them! I just want to be more interesting. At my age (31), the few unmarried women who are left are in a hurry to get married, and they don't want to waste their time with someone who they can't imagine spending the rest of their lives with.

StPaulGuy wrote :
Get outside, read a book, read the paper and develop some interests to talk about. You would be surprised how few guys actually read or follow current events.
- July 4th, 2009, 09:03 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
Altair Altair is offline
Altair's Avatar

Enthusiast

Join Date: Oct 2008

Posts: 754

See profile

You can always learn to ski, snowboard, or anything else. And you can always get a well paying job. Everybody has to start at the beginning in the dating game just like you. The things one can have to offer a woman is kindness, truth and honesty, a gentle spirit, and a good work ethic, not to mention a loving heart. If you havee these you have already won half the battle. You just have to look past the materialistic and shallow women and find one that matches your offerings.
Last edited by Altair; July 4th, 2009 at 10:18 pm. Reason: misspelling
- July 4th, 2009, 10:18 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
singinggirl singinggirl is offline
singinggirl's Avatar

singinggirl is so glad to be home. :-)

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 488

See profile

Are you kind and loving? Are you a good provider? (which doesn't necessarily mean independently wealthy) Are you honest and trustworthy? Will you treat me with respect? Can you make my heart do a little flip-flop when I see you or hear your voice? In essence, are you a good man who will cherish me and who I can cherish? If so, you have a lot to offer.
- July 4th, 2009, 10:34 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#8   Reply With Quote
StPaulGuy StPaulGuy is offline
StPaulGuy's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 10

See profile

BadAtNickNames wrote :
I used to read a lot of books - probably two or three a month. I still read the newspapers everyday. It just seems most women are more interested in a guy who has exciting hobbies than a guy who has a high IQ. And I can hardly blame them! I just want to be more interesting. At my age (31), the few unmarried women who are left are in a hurry to get married, and they don't want to waste their time with someone who they can't imagine spending the rest of their lives with.
Having a high IQ does not translating into being able to talk about interesting things on a date. I am not sure woman want a guy with some cool hobbies, just someone who is out there living life and being active. If you read a lot of profiles woman state they like to travel, are involved in some activity like running, biking etc.

In general most people lead fairly boring lives that is why we have movies, books, we travel and watch TV shows/sports. Life is not like the beer commercials with the most interesting man in the world. With that said you don't want to come across as the most boring guy in the world. What exactly do you do with your free time that comes across as boring?
- July 5th, 2009, 02:35 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#9   Reply With Quote
Wootz Wootz is offline
Wootz's Avatar

Wootz Gone to the family reunion all weekend! Packing the medkit and riot gear...

Pacesetter

Join Date: May 2009

Posts: 383

See profile

Nick, not having those kind of hobbies should not be an immediate “Close Now!” sign to the right kind of woman. What I think women really want (could be wrong here), is a guy with passion, stability, the capacity for joy, and who is able to make them feel loved. Hobbies are not passions. Remember your profile- what does it say in that first section? What exactly is it that interests you so much you'd drop your cheeseburger to go investigate? I don't think your problem is that you aren't interesting enough, it may be just a matter of communication. As others have said here, kindness, truth, and honesty are essential, what you do with your free time is kinda circumstantial. What drives you can be a strong magnet for the kind of person you want to notice you. I think people are attracted to those who *are* actively passionate about something- that, and a good, positive attitude can take you far. Good luck!
- July 5th, 2009, 03:06 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#10   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2

Bookmarks

« When the weekend plan does not include you | Array | Where's my self esteem? »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Dating a Jewish Woman Skyking6976 Dating 20 June 7th, 2009 04:03 pm
What makes a man or woman “fit” for military service? D_Lion Politics 41 May 27th, 2009 06:31 pm

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“So unless someone agrees with you they are immature? Really? For me it can be from 2 to 3 dates. Usually it's by the end of the second date. With my age I guess that means I'm not mature. On the ... ” – jayjay

Join the “how many dates before a guy...” discussion

“I absolutely loved what WonderWoman said above =) As a general rule, yes ...I believe that it is better to have loved and lost ... ...but there's that one relationship where, regardless of what I ... ” – BikerBeagle

Join the “IS it better to have loved and lost....” discussion

“"Surprise" Skype date with my long-distance match! Spent an hour or so in the southern hemisphere.... It was lovely. ” – Iconography

Join the “Gimme some Friday Night Roll Call !!!!” discussion

“The best thing you can do in my opinion is just to let your sister know you are there for her. I feel honestly, and this is my deep down belief and you should seriously think about this...silence ... ” – indigirl1975

Join the “What can I do?” discussion

“Sounds to me like, after a long 'dry spell' you are desperate to be in a relationship ...with pretty much anyone who will communicate with you and "make it that far" with. First thing, slow down. ... ” – BikerBeagle

Join the “How do you know you won't regret” discussion

“Hmmm I re-read the original post again, and I didn't get the feeling that the OP was really looking for a rich guy or anything like that. I've also mentioned that aside from possible bad divorces, ... ” – churumbeque

Join the “where men are financially now” discussion

“If anyone should be shy about positing a pic it should be me. The pic I have here on this profile is my main pic for my eHarmony profile and most of the pics, but not all are of me in action. I mean, ... ” – melcalrrt

Join the “Girls stop communicating after seeing my pix” discussion

“ Oh, there can be a funny side to safety precautions. Of late I've occasionally gone out with a Ms J who was born in China. She's petty and intrigues me; among which are her views of safety. This ... ” – Fleuellen

Join the “Safety precautions and dating” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:50 am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0